don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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