just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
