i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
