I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Barsexuality is the new black.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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