their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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