Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
