i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
