I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
