I wannas sexs uuuuu
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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