There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I skipped work to stalk him.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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