I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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