i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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