Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
