Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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