We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
