At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I need water and some morals
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
