I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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