ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
