he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
