So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
