Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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