Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
