rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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