I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
