If that was your dad, he is hot
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
