The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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