A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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