If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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