Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
