Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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