im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
