i think my tv is drunk
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
You can't special order awesome
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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