Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
