i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
should my penis look like a turkey
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
