I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize