sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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