he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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