On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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