Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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