I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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