no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Sober January is a disaster.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
