Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
