you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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