So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
