Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
