Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
