this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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