She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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