drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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