What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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